Longtime Kennett football coach, teacher Gary Millen dies at 53

Millen remembered as a winner on the football field, in the classroom and in the community

He was perhaps best known in the community as Kennett High School's longtime football coach who led the Eagles to several state titles.But to those who knew him best, Gary Millen was "much more than that," close friend Gary MacDonald said Sunday.Millen died unexpectedly on Friday afternoon after suffering a heart attack at his Freedom home. He was 53.Originally from Massachusetts, Millen moved to Mount Washington Valley and joined the teaching staff at Kennett High in 1976. He was Kennett's head football coach for 28 years, and he was also a social studies teacher.MacDonald, who is now superintendent for MSAD 72 in Western Maine, had known Millen for 30 years. They lived next door to each other when Millen first moved to the area."I was teaching in Bartlett at the time," MacDonald said, "so we had the connection of both being teachers, and we were similarly interested in kids and athletics and the community."MacDonald and Millen remained close friends over the years and often did friendly battle on the basketball court and tennis court. Although he had experienced heart problems previously, those problems had been "addressed," MacDonald said, and Millen was very active. In fact, he had been jogging on Friday just before he died.For family and friends, Millen's death is an "absolute shock," MacDonald said."It's an incredible loss, a sudden loss," he said. "It's really hard for everybody to understand. There are a variety of emotions that everybody is going through. But the family is doing as well as they can and trying to recognize all that Gary brought to life."Those contributions, MacDonald said, were vast."Football coaching was very important to him," MacDonald said, "but that was just one aspect of his life. His threads went in so many directions. He touched so many people in so many ways. He was just a unique and special individual who brought so much to the community. As the days and months go along, people will understand even more how he contributed to so many things so quietly."MacDonald described Millen as a person who was "respectful of everyone" and who "expected respect" in return."He really demanded excellence," MacDonald said, "but he did it in a way that really met the needs of everyone. He was very humble in his own approach, but very clear in terms of his own convictions. He was a person of integrity and fairness. He always did what was right and fair, regardless of what others thought."He was the type of personality that was innately good," MacDonald added. "It comes from the respect that he had for the people he worked with, whether they were colleagues, players, students or coaches, and that respect reflected back to him."Art Walker, head of the Kennett High Football Boosters, said he considered Millen a "mentor as well as a friend.""I discussed with him all the agenda items (for the football boosters club) before I brought them to the board because I respected his wisdom," Walker said. "He was a gentleman from the word go. He was a gentleman on the ballfield and off the ballfield a real model person for kids and adults. When he said something, you listened because he thought things through. My life has been enriched by knowing Gary.""Role model" is a term that many were using in describing Millen."He certainly was a quality individual, a great teacher and a great coach," SAU 9 Superintendent Carl Nelson said. "In my view, he was a real role model for both kids and his colleagues."Nelson added, "I think he had a way of demanding things of kids and in a way they respected, and they produced for him in the classroom, and I think that's true on the football field as well."As a member of the Conway Village ambulance squad, David Weathers spent a lot of time on the sidelines with Millen during Kennett home football games. Weathers has also been involved with youth sports as a coach and umpire, so he knew Millen well."He came across as being quite serious," Weathers said, "He had a sense of humor, but it was hard to detect it sometimes. The football kids really respected him. When he talked, they listened. He understood the game, and he understood kids."David Weathers and his wife, Elaine, have two sons who played football for Millen."He was one of those coaches who you were never concerned about how he was going to react to how the kids were doing on the field, or not doing," Elaine Weathers said. "He seemed to always be able to bring them back, even if they suffered a hard loss or a hard first half of the game. He seemed to be able to pull from kids the best they could be on that field. It goes a long way when you learn how good you can be when you really try. It's definitely a life lesson. Anybody who teaches kids life lessons are certainly people to be cherished."Peter Ames was one of Millen's assistant coaches for the football team and also a fellow history teacher."We've had lots of dealings both in and out of school," Ames said. "Certainly he was always a gentleman and a person who had high moral standards for himself and the kids he dealt with. It's just tragic that it ended the way it did, but I think he had a big impact on thousands of lives of kids and people he associated with, so his legacy will continue on for years through several generations of kids."Ames described Millen as a "good guy who was dedicated to helping kids and doing things the correct way."He was highly respected throughout the football community, but also, more than just a football coach, he was very connected to the academic side of things at school and trying to keep kids on the right path," Ames said. "I think the big thing with Gary was that he appealed to a wide range of people. It would be hard to find somebody who didn't have something good to say about him. He was certainly able to mix in with a variety of kids, and he wasn't your prototypical football coach. You kind of think of a football coach as a rough, yelling kind of guy, and that really wasn't Gary's style."Bob Moore, a teacher and coach at Kennett, also described Millen as a "well-respected community member" who set high standards for students and players, and who helped them meet those standards."I can't help but think about the number of kids' lives he has touched through so many years at Kennett through the classroom and the football field," Moore said. "He had his way of teaching. Kids accepted that, and he challenged them. He stuck with his message, and it worked."Visiting hours for Millen will be Tuesday from 4 to 8 p.m. at Furber and White Funeral Home in North Conway. A celebration of Millen's life will be Wednesday at 4 p.m. at the Kennett High gymnasium, with a reception to follow in the Kennett cafeteria.Anyone interested in helping with refreshments for the reception should contact Elaine Weathers at 447-5469. People attending the celebration of life are also invited to bring stories and pictures of Millen, in 8-by-11-inch format, for a memory book that will be compiled.Special sections editor Bart Bachman can be contacted at bart@conwaydailysun.com.