On Jan. 1, I awoke to a new year and all its promise. I turned on the TV where credible networks continue to fill air time parading credible infectious disease experts urging credible mitigation measures such as vaccination and masking, i.e. preaching to the choir. Resolution No. 1: Stop watching TV news.

Rather than venturing out, I opened the Daily Sun online to peruse the top local stories and newsmakers of 2021. One choice item to which I was treated online, though not found in Saturday’s physical paper, was the infamous photo of Steve “The Finger” Steiner presumably flipping us the bird. I say presumably because his finger is pixelated in the kind of photo generally reserved for genitalia. The photo was obscured, I’m assuming, to protect the sensibilities of delicate flowers such as myself.

The actual newspaper features only Steiner’s memorable quote recommending “giving” the finger. So magnanimous. The gift of giving! No need to rerun the visual already seared into our collective brain. Resolution No. 2: Read the paper version of the Sun.

After my shower, during which I tried desperately to “unsee” the aforementioned photograph, I upheld an annual ritual and stepped onto the scale. It appears to be broken. Resolution No. 3: The usual. Drop 10 pounds. Oh, and this time keep it off.

But first I’d be going out for New Year’s breakfast to celebrate the end of another unsettling year and to welcome with open arms a new dawn filled with hope, positivity, re-entry into life — this all due to the flip of a calendar page.

Respectfully masked, my husband and I walked into the restaurant to find ourselves the only two in the house adhering to CDC recommendations. Fortunately we’d arrived at an off hour and there were few patrons. We were met and seated by a maskless hostess who turned out also to be our maskless waitress. In my eternal struggle between politeness and self-preservation where politeness always reigns victorious, I resigned myself to my fate and ordered breakfast.

Whenever the waitress approached the table I held my breath hoping to ward off any rogue droplets propelled my way, praying she wouldn’t linger as I tried to avoid taking on a blue hue from lack of oxygen. I’ve developed considerable lung capacity after nearly two years of holding my breath while passing many a maskless patron in the aisles of Hannaford. Still, the exercise this day proved quite a challenge. In the words of the Reverend Mother repeated by the illustrious (and pre-Von Trapp) Maria, “When the Lord closes a door, somewhere he opens a window.” Well, not at this dining establishment.

When we left the restaurant I said to my husband, “It will be nothing short of a miracle if we didn’t contract Omicron.” Resolutions No. 5: Dine at home, and No. 6: Watch “The Sound of Music” for the 246th time.

Dutiful daughter that I am, after breakfast I called my mother to wish her a Happy New Year. “No, I don’t brew beer!” Two weeks prior, I visited her and she couldn’t hear a thing with or without her hearing aids, so I scheduled the audiologist for a check-up. In addition to clearing her ears of wax he made adjustments to her hearing aids, after which her caregiver and her grandson both reported significant improvement.

“Mom, are you wearing your hearing aids? I was told that you were hearing much better.”

“You got an Irish setter? Don’t you have enough dogs?”

I proceeded to ask the question again, this time projecting my voice to a level certain to test my new phone’s transmission limitations.

“No, they’re in the other room and I’m not there.” Seemingly disinclined to amend the communication impasse, this comedy of the absurd continued until I’d reached my limit which takes far less time than it once did. As with in-person visits, I try to end things before I either lose my temper or dive into a bottle of wine.

Considering it was 10 a.m., not to mention the start of my positive and hopeful new year, I pulled an ace out of my sleeve: bad cell service. I walked to the other side of the kitchen where the call would inevitably be dropped. Resolution No. 8: Stop complaining about the communication issue in South Conway and recognize it for what it is. A blessing, aka that open window.

Jonna Carter lives in South Conway with her husband and five crazy rescue dogs.

Recommended for you

(2) comments

MEPD Ret

“I turned on the TV where credible networks continue to fill air time parading credible infectious disease experts urging credible mitigation measures such as vaccination and masking, i.e. preaching to the choir.”

Joanne,

I would ask you to give your definition of “credible”.

Because credibility is one thing that is in extremely short supply these days.

And, while you contemplate the meaning of credible you can also consider your innermost thoughts on integrity, truth, freedom, and independence.

To think or believe that there is one “approved” solution, thought, or behavior is not only naive, but it is also extremely dangerous.

It’s not as if this type of idea wasn’t tried before with dire, deadly consequences. Just look at history [The Inquisition, Nazi Germany, Stalinist Russia, China’s Cultural Revolution, Cambodia’s Killing Fields].

I would also encourage you to consider the possibility that there are certain extremely powerful entities that would benefit from being able to manipulate entire large populations for their own gains and forwarding their own agenda. The melding of Corporate News/Media/Tech, Industrial Pharma, and Government Complex at this scale has never been seen before. And frankly should frighten you.

There are no easy solutions to the myriad complex problems facing us at this point in time. To surrender your mind, body, and family over to those that would lure us with the promise of a simple “one size fits all” fix isn’t just foolish, it’s unethical, criminal, and evil down to its core.

MEPD Ret

If you need a mental nudge:

On Dec. 10, 2020, the British Broadcasting Corporation launched an agreement called the Trusted News Initiative. The premise was to support the COVID vaccine concept and prevent any dissenting viewpoints from seeing the light of day. They became the arbiters of truth, with a self-appointed charter to “inform future media education programs.”

The signers of the agreement include AFP, CBC/Radio Canada, Financial Times, First Draft, Washington Post, NY Times, Deutsche Press, Agence France Presse, Facebook, Google/YouTube, Microsoft, Twitter, the Associated Press and Reuters.

You can start looking into the members of these Corporate Boards and their relationship(s) with Gov't officials and Big Pharma.

Also, start reading the Trusted News Initiatives' ideas of how to control the "The Truth" or their idea of what the truth is.

Welcome to the discussion.

Keep it Clean. Please avoid obscene, vulgar, lewd, racist or sexually-oriented language.
PLEASE TURN OFF YOUR CAPS LOCK.
Don't Threaten. Threats of harming another person will not be tolerated.
Be Truthful. Don't knowingly lie about anyone or anything.
Be Nice. No racism, sexism or any sort of -ism that is degrading to another person.
Be Proactive. Use the 'Report' link on each comment to let us know of abusive posts.
Share with Us. We'd love to hear eyewitness accounts, the history behind an article.