Kathleen Avery was born in Rochester, N.H., on March 31, 1952, to Lillian (Rising) and Roger Emerson Shorey.

She was raised in York, Maine, where she graduated from York High School as salutatorian. She then graduated from Bates College with a degree in psychology. She met David Erwin Avery at Pilgrim Lodge, where they both served as councilors. They were married on July 18, 1976, in the First Parish Church UCC of York. She moved into the parsonage of the First Congregational UCC Church of Eliot, Maine, where David served as minister.

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